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Old 28-Oct-2010, 05:00 AM (05:00)     1        41541
Gurdur
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Default Good advice

Somewhat overly ranty, but good advice on the whole.


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Old 28-Oct-2010, 05:50 AM (05:50)     2        41542
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I think I'd be pissed if I was pressured to have my nose re-jiggered at 16 as well. I wonder if she actually did manage to go ten years without seeing herself in a mirror. That would be downright impossible for me to pull off.
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Old 06-Nov-2010, 09:01 PM (21:01)     3        41720
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"Somewhat overly ranty..." is an understatement. That woman has severe issues. She needs help (and I don't mean physical).
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Old 07-Nov-2010, 01:15 AM (01:15)     4        41723
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Originally Posted by homo hirsutus View Post
I think I'd be pissed if I was pressured to have my nose re-jiggered at 16 as well. I wonder if she actually did manage to go ten years without seeing herself in a mirror. That would be downright impossible for me to pull off.
I think she's talking about the ten years since her nose job.

I understand what she's saying and just sort of shake my head that there are women who still think that pretty = loved. Or that beauty = pain. I've known some gorgeous people who were royal pains in the asses. As for beauty = pain... I think we all know how I feel about that, LOL. Fuck that shit!
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Old 07-Nov-2010, 12:16 PM (12:16)     5        41727
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Originally Posted by Makbawehuh View Post
I understand what she's saying and just sort of shake my head that there are women who still think that pretty = loved. Or that beauty = pain. I've known some gorgeous people who were royal pains in the asses. As for beauty = pain... I think we all know how I feel about that, LOL. Fuck that shit!
Didn't watch the video as I ran out of time but I did want to comment that it doesn't surprise me in any way that women/girls equate pretty with being loved. Think about all the fairy tales, Disney movies, toys, like Barbie and the incessant push to wear make-up that surrounds you. At least on this side of the pond, growing up is all about looking good even if that means surgery, crash dieting or using crystal meth.

For some women, beauty can equal pain especially if that woman has not had the kind of strong parenting needed to point out the pitfalls of physical attractiveness. ie understanding the difference between boys/men who are reacting to beauty and those who respect her. Or if she has any kind of 'difference', typically mental health or a delay of some kind that makes her more vulnerable. Then beauty can be a double-edged sword.

Just saying...
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Old 08-Nov-2010, 02:34 AM (02:34)     6        41743
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Originally Posted by Marian View Post
Didn't watch the video as I ran out of time but I did want to comment that it doesn't surprise me in any way that women/girls equate pretty with being loved. Think about all the fairy tales, Disney movies, toys, like Barbie and the incessant push to wear make-up that surrounds you. At least on this side of the pond, growing up is all about looking good even if that means surgery, crash dieting or using crystal meth.
I know, believe me I know. I am just really glad none of that stuck to me as a kid... I'm not sure how I managed to avoid that as a child. It definately caused issues with my dad's second wife; she was one of those "beaty = pain, pretty = love" sorts, and my reaction was "God, that's stupid. I'm smart, I don't need makeup to make me pretty, and people don't like me even though I'm gorgeous."

There were fistfights over this, believe it or not. I went from "I don't need makeup" to "I hate that makeup shit with a passion" during that period, and I -still- hate makeup with a passion.

Somewhat amusing sidenote: I mentioned a couple years ago that Barbie looked like a slut with her makeup that looks like it was applied with a trowel, and my mother became convinced I had a problem with sluts. Nevermind that I've hated Barbie since I was like, five. I love my mom. >.<

Quote:
For some women, beauty can equal pain especially if that woman has not had the kind of strong parenting needed to point out the pitfalls of physical attractiveness. ie understanding the difference between boys/men who are reacting to beauty and those who respect her. Or if she has any kind of 'difference', typically mental health or a delay of some kind that makes her more vulnerable. Then beauty can be a double-edged sword.

Just saying...
Even a parent who tries to impress upon their children the difference doesn't always manage to get the message through. My little sister still seems to think pretty = loved, even though my mom's tried really hard to get her to understand otherwise. I think it's the aforementioned Disney/Barbie/Etc influence... Kinda sad, I keep hoping she'll learn.
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